Are you a mom? No? Well, keep reading anyway because everyone needs to know why every mom on this planet is tired. In fact, we are exhausted, pooped, spent, weary, tired-tired, drained and finished. We would like nothing more than to curl up in a deprivation room to sleep for a week. It's overwhelming being a mom. The other day I was talking to someone who didn't have children. They offered up how they pattern their day for success. It went something like this:

6:15 - 7:00 Meditation & Shower
7:00 - 7:30 Breakfast (Protein focused)
7:30 - 8:30 Listen to Podcast
8:30 - 11 am Creative time. Work.
11am - 1pm Lunch & Collaboration
1 - 2 pm Go for a nice walk /Go for a run
2 - 4pm Email & Accounting
4 - 5 pm Focused Learning By Course Work
6 - 7 pm Dinner & Drinks with friends
7 - 9 pm Catching the latest documentary or art film
9 pm Bedtime

First, it took me at least 15 minutes to understand this list. It was as if someone handed me a pooping purple unicorn. From a mom's point of view, it's the finest piece of fiction I have ever had the pleasure of reading. Let me say I don't doubt the person who wrote the list does what is on the list. I'm not calling them I liar; I'm just in awe someone has time to do all the things on the list and write the list and email the list. After the bullet points had soaked themselves into my mush of cerebral cortex, I murmured under my breath "God bless this person."

The bullet point that seemed the most unrealistic was the last bullet point: "9 pm bedtime." The last time I went to bed at 9 pm was the year 2011 when I was hauling around a human inside my womb. That was six years ago. Plus, bullet point person most likely acquires a whole night of interrupted sleep. They probably snooze for eight hours without someone getting right in their face at 4:35 am demanding a freshly made breakfast burrito and a few episodes of a desperately loved cartoon about a pack of wild dogs who pull together to save the world all supervised by a mayor who is in love with a chicken.

Point number one to recognize, moms don't get enough quality sleep. Write that down, please.

Second, bullet point set for 1 pm - 2 am made me spit out my coffee. Who has time to "Go for a nice walk/Go for a run" in the middle of the day? The most running I do is running after a 4-year-old to make sure his pants don't fall off. Besides making sure clothing says on, and sensitive body parts stay hidden, we have to encourage, develop, and grow our families into productive organisms of society. We also need to physically carry our children wherever we go. Every day we run to the next stop and spot. Our time isn't spent on "me time" but everyone "just stay live time."

Point number two, recognize moms spend our time making everyone complete. It's physically and emotionally draining.

The bullet points for "Lunch & Collaboration" and "Dinner & Drinks with Friends" need to be clarified. Are the bullet points saying this person eats a full and balanced meal without interruption? Let me just mention for the past six years I have been buying organic fruit and vegetables for the entire family. Someone told me that in order for my family not to grow horns, I had to feed everyone $5 pints of organic strawberries grown on a farm one mile from the Pacific ocean. My kids love to eat the entire pint in one sitting while I stare on. It came to my attention although most of my life savings are used to buy to fresh produce, I rarely eat any of the perfect groceries I bring home.

Last point, mom is most likely malnourished. Buy her a fruit salad.

And then make her this smoothie because it's good for her and it might give her a bit of a jump start. More importantly, every mom is doing a hard job raising the next members of society every day with little to no time to care for themselves and they are tired. Very, very tired.

Mother Lover Smoothie

8oz coconut milk
1 tablespoon coconut oil
1 tablespoon turmeric powder
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
2 tablespoons raw honey
1 cup frozen organic blueberries
1 packet of frozen acai berry smoothie pack
8 oz Health-Ade Kombucha Ginger-Lemon flavor

Step 1: In a microwave safe bowl, heat the coconut oil in the microwave for 15 seconds or until it becomes a liquid. Stir in the turmeric and black pepper.

Step 2: Place the mixture in a blender. Add the coconut milk, honey, blueberries, smoothie pack and Kombucha. Blend until smooth. Serve immediately and with an hour set aside for a nap for mom.